Sunday, June 1, 2008

My Exclusive Interview With A Barack Obama Cultist

I recently had the opportunity to interview a devoted Barack Obama supporter. Here are her answers to my penetrating questions. I don’t know if the supporter, whom I’ll call “Verdant Miller,” is typical of Obama’s supporters, since I only personally know about 120 such people, but I do know that she is typical of the only supporter who was willing to sit down and answer some questions from me.

Question: Some people have suggested that Obama’s a sort of messianic figure, and his followers are like cultists. What do you say about that?

Answer: The movement of change that Senator Barack Obama inspires is not a cult. That’s ridiculous, and was probably dreamed up by some right-wing Clinton supporter trying to discredit him. I resent the question, and I don’t know why you would even ask it. Who are you supporting?

Q: I’m not supporting anyone for president.

A: You’re cynical, but there’s no need to be anymore. We finally have a candidate who’s willing to make real change. Not just in government, but in our attitude.

Q: Do you really think it’s the president’s job to change your attitude?

A: It’s cynical and defeatist attitudes like yours that have led to the present state of our country’s problems. People don’t expect their leaders to inspire them, so they vote for agents of hate like Bushit, McSame, and Shillery.

Q: What do you think would change if Obama were elected president?

A: Only everything! We’d see a new awakening in this country. We could finally reconcile our healing, and move forward in our program of change. The government could finally get around to doing what it was meant to do, such as providing health care for everyone, and good jobs that pay at least $15.00 an hour, to be increased each year to keep up with inflation, and sound economic policies that decrease inflation while increasing economic justice for everyone, and healing our environment and ending our dependence on oil and also ending high gas and food prices, and finally inspiring citizens to see that change begins with them, and only they can make real, meaningful change.

Q: So, you want the government to take care of everything, but you want citizens to make change for themselves?

A: I misspoke. When Senator Obama becomes President Obama, the government will make the change for us, so we don’t have to.

Q: Is there anything you think President Obama can’t do?

A: That’s a cynical question. If and when the real change occurs and the Republicans don’t steal another election and Senator Obama fulfills his destiny to become our mighty President Obama, you will lose your cynicism the way I have, and submit finally to the overwhelming power of a government headed by an enlightened leader.

Q: Now you really do sound like a cultist.

A: No; a cultist is a person who is in a cult, which is a group that is headed by one charismatic leader, and the cultist follows that leader unquestioningly. Barack Obama’s supporters are devoted to the feelings that he inspires in us. “Yes, we can,” he says. We can. The people. We the people, like it says in the Constitution. We love that about him.


Some Obama supporters, such as my interview subject, have taken to showing their enthusiasm for the candidate by wearing a mask of his face. They say they like the feeling of "closeness, almost like we are a little bit like Obama" that it gives them.

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