Thursday, September 2, 2010

Jerry Lewis Wants to Spank Lindsay Lohan, for Her Own Good

"I would say, 'You deserve this and nothing else' ... WHACK! And then, if she's not satisfied, I'd put her over my knee and spank her and then put her in rehab and that's it."
That is Jerry Lewis, host of the annual MDA Labor Day telethon to help children afflicted with muscular dystrophy, explaining what I wish I could do if only he'd like to do to Lindsay Lohan. Don't believe it? Watch the man in action, here:

And about Paris Hilton, he said,
The same thing with Paris Hilton. Those children are begging for the loving dominance of an older man with a firm hand help.
Tell me you're not thinking the same thing I am: Both of these women would be willing to submit to such treatment, for the right price. At least, if certain rumors are true.

I'm not saying those rumors are true. Just perpetuating them I don't spread rumors.

Anyway, I can think of so many actresses/starlets/famous women who deserve to be turned over my knee and spanked saved from themselves. Megan Fox needs a good spanking. Very hard, right against the buttocks. Naomi Watts is so bad sometimes, you can just tell that she needs some discipline. Halle Berry could also use a spanking. Kristin Davis, I'm so disappointed in you -- you need a spanking! Erin Andrews! Bad girl! Of course, Myrna Loy has been very, very, very bad. Only a firm paddling could rescue her. Barbara Stanwyck? She should just go ahead and change her name to Barbara Redbottom when I get done with her. Clara Bow is so, so very bad.

Anyway. What was I saying?

Oh, yeah. Jerry Lewis is kinda pervy has a good point, doesn't he?

Lindsay Lohan, Britney Spears, Paris Hilton. Three young women who really need a good spanking. All at the same time. For their own good. Yes, I am volunteering my services; Jerry Lewis's hands are too old and frail to handle all the spanking that must be done to cleanse Hollywood.

Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan, Britney Spears pic source.

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