Thursday, October 28, 2010

I was actually once in a hotel room with Charlie Sheen

Charlie Sheen, the star of movies like "Platoon" and "Wall Street," and of the current television program "Two and a Half Men," recently got himself checked into a hospital for a psychiatric evaluation after doing something in a hotel room.
Charlie Sheen has broken his silence about his crazed coke and booze binge with a prostitute that left him in a New York hospital early Tuesday morning.

Speaking exclusively to, the Two and a Half Men star downplayed claims he trashed his posh room at The Plaza Hotel, in a frantic bid to find his wallet and cell phone after partying with a hooker.

“Oh my man, I’m fine,” he told’s Senior Executive Editor Dylan Howard, when asked about his condition after being carted off to the hospital for a mental health evaluation.
“The story is totally overblown and overplayed as far as the reality of the scenario.”
Earlier Tuesday, he had checked out of New York Presbyterian Hospital, where he underwent a psychiatric evaluation.

As previously reported, the Emmy nominated and Golden Globe winning actor was naked and out of control when cops burst into his trashed suite, next to the room where his ex-wife Denise Richards and their two young daughters - Sam, six, and Lola, five - were staying.
He was found naked and in an altered state, according to cops.

Sheen told he had no plans to reveal exactly what happened in Room 1832: “I know what went down and that’s where it will stay... under wraps.”
The best part of the RadarOnline story is this line:
Sheen spoke to via text message shortly after he arrived home in Los Angeles on a private jet Tuesday night.
That is how you do an interview after being found naked and in an altered state and just checking out of a hospital for a psychiatric evaluation and being flown home in a private jet. Via text message. He probably hadn't had a chance to get to his twitter feed.

Anyway, it turns out that RadarOnline might be wrong about the "prostitute" part. She might only be a pornographic film actress, as TMZ is reporting.
TMZ knows the identity of the woman who ended up locked in Charlie Sheen's hotel bathroom early Tuesday morning at The Plaza Hotel ... she's Capri Anderson, a 22-year-old porn star.

Capri Anderson

Anderson -- who's been in a ton of adult features -- has told friends she's extremely upset about recent reports that she's either an escort or a prostitute ... Anderson is adamant she's NOT a working girl.

Sources close to Anderson tell us the 22-year-old was "extremely afraid" of Sheen during the hotel incident. Anderson is telling friends she decided to call hotel security because she felt "threatened" by the sitcom star.

Law enforcement sources tell us officials have no plans to file charges against Charlie.
And as for those not filing any charges, well, Mr. Sheen is rich.
We're told Charlie's rep has already contacted bigwigs at The Plaza and made it clear -- Charlie will pay for anything he damaged or destroyed during all the craziness.  We're hearing the cost is estimated at $7,000 ... but it could go higher.

One big reason for Charlie's rep to jump on paying the tab .... we're told The Plaza has no interest in having Charlie prosecuted for criminal mischief -- provided the hotel is made whole.
And he makes a lot of money for CBS and Warner Bros:
Never mind the messy details, here’s the most surprising thing about the ordeal: people continue to be surprised to hear Warner Brothers, the studio the produces Sheen’s show, and CBS, the network that airs it, are standing by him (again)? And yes, not commenting or attempting to ignore the situation is the same thing in my book.

Of course they are. Sheen, after all, is a one-man profit center.

Sheen didn’t make $30 million last year, a figure poised to soar this season care of his latest contract extension, because his bosses think he’s a good, reliable guy. Judging from the endless stream of trouble he seems to find himself in, they’re probably pretty convinced he’s anything but – but it doesn’t matter.

What matters is Two and a Half Men, the show he has carried for eight seasons, is the most-watched comedy in prime-time.Thus far this season, the sitcom is averaging 15.2 million viewers, a particularly impressive feat given both it’s age and the increasingly fractured landscape it plays in. Among the all-important 18 to 49-year-old audience, it draws a highly competitive 5.2 rating. That translates to approximately $207,000 per ad, the second priciest live-action comedy in prime-time (behind NBC’s lesser watched The Office), according to Advertising Age’s annual report. Last season, it generated $155.1 million in CBS ad revenue for the Tifany network, reports Kantar Media. And none of that factors in the many millions in syndication revenue Warner Brothers (like Sheen) is raking in on an annual basis.
And so that's why Mr. Sheen gets to trash hotel rooms, or (allegedly) threaten his wife by putting a knife to her throat (and in an argument over something as substantial as a Train song!), or whatever. The man helps make a lot of money for two big corporations.  And that makes the world go round.

That last sentence wasn't meant to be ironic. He helps make a lot of money, which in turn is used to employ a lot of people, etc. That is the way things work.

But to get back to my headline: I was actually once in a hotel room with Charlie Sheen. He did not "trash" the room, but he did go to the bathroom and pee with the door open. I couldn't see him peeing, but I could hear it.

Waaay  back in 2000, I had a very menial job on a studio lot. One of my assignments was to work the ABC network's "Press Tour" at a very fancy hotel in Pasadena. This was an event in which many of the stars of ABC shows, like "Whose Line is it Anyway?," "Norm," and "Monday Night Football" came to promote their shows to the "critics" who wrote about those shows. This promotion came in two forms -- the first was a panel discussion in which several actors and writers would sit on the stage and discuss the shows, and take questions from the critics in the audience. The second was a series of one-n-one interviews in rooms the network had rented. The stars would be led from one room to another, answering the same dumb questions over and over again.

One of those ABC shows was "Spin City," which at that time starred Heather Locklear and Charlie Sheen. (Aside: Heather Locklear, in person, is one of the most strikingly attractive women in the world. At least, she was back in 2000. I mean, she was breathtakingly beautiful. Why didn't I get to escort her around? Well, I was unlucky. The guy who did get to escort her was a decent soul, however, so if anyone else got to do it, I was glad it was him.) I was one of the peons who had to meet the celebrities at their cars and walk them into the hotel, and make sure they got where they needed to go.

The "Spin City" panel was ten minutes away. Ms. Locklear and the other cast and crew were already in the ballroom, ready to go. Mr. Sheen still hadn't arrived at the hotel. There was some worry, because Mr. Sheen had recently left rehab; the network had some concerns about Mr. Sheen's reliability, which is probably why I of all people was in charge of escorting him to the panel.

"You've got to make sure he gets to that ballroom, just as soon as he gets here," my supervisor told me.

"Okay, I'll do what I can," I shrugged. "But he's a rich and famous star, and I'm a nobody, so he'll probably just ignore me and do what he wants."

As it turns out, this was what he did.

He arrived a few minutes later and sidled right up to his limousine. One of the men who was with him, an agent or manager, handed me a suit that must have just come from the dry cleaners. He was on the phone, but he cupped a hand over the receiver and told me, "We're in room XXX" (I don't remember the room number). "Okay," I said, "but the 'Spin City' panel begins in five minutes."

"We've got time to go to the room and drop some things off first."

"You're the boss," I said.

I had no idea where the room was, but since I'm not a complete moron I was able to follow the signs and get us there. His room was on the third or fourth floor, I think. The ballroom was on the first floor. In other words, I was leading him away from where he was supposed to be, and the panel was set to start any second.

Mr. Sheen and his agent or manager or whatever he was were blithely discussing something, I couldn't hear them over the pounding of my own heart in my ears. You know, because I was a peon who'd been charged with getting this man to his panel on time and that was clearly not going to happen.

We went to the hotel room. The panel was set to begin. Right then. I decided I would stick with them, as a sort of living reminder of the fact that the panel was set to begin, right then. Into the room the three of us went. The manager/agent took the suit from me. Mr. Sheen went to the bathroom. He started to pee.

He then, while still peeing, leaned backward so that his head was in the doorway. "Is there any reason you're still here?" he asked me.

"Well, the panel is starting right now, so I wanted to  be sure you guys knew where to go."

"Oh, we'll find it. It's in the ballroom, right?" he said. He was actually, I have to say, extremely polite.

"Yeah, we can find it," the manager/agent said.

"Okay, as long as you guys are set, I'll head back down."

"Thanks a lot," the manager/agent said, closing the door behind me. I half expected/wanted a tip. Didn't get one.

I went back down to my supervisor. "Did he make it to the panel?"

I explained everything that had happened, then added, "Like I said, he's a big star and fabulously wealthy. Who am I to tell him what to do?"

"Yeah, I guess," my supervisor shrugged. "If he said he could make it, he can make it."

A few seconds passed and then my supervisor said, "Actually, why don't you go back and see if you can find him. He's still not at the panel and they're worried he might have gotten lost."

It didn't occur to me that he might have gotten lost, since there were signs pointing you in the direction of the ballroom. However, I went back up to his floor, and found him and his manager/agent wandering the halls. They saw me and their faces lit up. It was as if they'd been looking for me!

"There you are!" Mr. Sheen said. He was very friendly. Perhaps we'd become friends. Seriously, wouldn't you like to have Charlie Sheen as a friend? He's rich and famous, and he does a lot of really fun stuff. (Alas, I never saw Mr. Sheen again after that day.)

"You guys ready?" I asked. Everything was perfectly normal. We'd had a small hiccup when I'd left my post after taking them at their word that they would get themselves down to the panel (after all, my job was to see that Mr. Sheen got to the panel, not to see that Mr. Sheen was aware of the panel and its location), but now we were back on target.

"Let's get this done, thanks," the manager/agent said. I led them down to the ballroom. They were less than ten minutes late. From what I understand, that was a very good showing for everyone involved.

And I don't think that Mr. Sheen "trashed" the hotel room, either. I credit my own calming influence.

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