Monday, October 24, 2011

My response to Madison's email to me and me alone

Recently I was excited to get an email from Madison, who is apparently a long-lost acquaintance of mine, or something. For some reason, this email went directly to my spam email folder. This makes no sense, since, as I've already stated, she is apparently a long-lost acquaintance of mine. Or something. She seems to know a lot about me, anyway. I thought I would take this opportunity to compose a response to her now, in front of all the world-- a special email such as Madison's requires a special response.
BABE... i guess your not getting any of my email huh? ive been tryign to email u so many times but this dam laptop is such a piece of garbage and keeps freezing.. anyways how u been? In case u dont know
who this is its ME MADISON.. we used to chat a bit on facebook and then I think u deleted me :( haha.. anyways guess what... I got 2 things to tell u.. both good news.. 1) im single now.. yup me and my bf broke up
about 3 months ago... and 2) guess where im moving? RIGHT EFFING NEAR U..
lol... ur actually the only person im gonna know there..
Ah, Madison. This is embarrassing. I have to admit that I do not remember you. I'm not sure why you can't find me on facebook, however, since you seem to know me so well, and apparently have my email address. I don't think I've ever "deleted" anyone from facebook, although I have in the past blocked some people from my newsfeed. Anyway, I am really sorry to hear about your breakup, but I'm glad that you can think of it as "good news." The ending of a relationship can be a painful experience, I know, but it is also an important opportunity to grow, and to open yourself to brand new possibilities. I'm also excited by the prospect of you moving right near me. It should be fun to finally meet face-to-face!
well 3 cousins too but i cant chill with them lol..I remember when we chatted u told me u thought i was cute and u wanted to chill so now we finally can HAHA! im kinda scared to move.. im hoping this email addy is still
the one you use and u can chat with me ebfore i get there.. maybe even help me move my shit in...are u still on facebook? i cudnt find ui was soo confused...anyways im gonna need someone to show me the town and
take me out so u better be around bebe...we only chatted a couple times but i remember thinking to myself i wanted to get ot know u better when i was single..a nd i thoguth u were cute too but cudnt tell u cause i wasnt single lol...ok so more info about me.. well im 23.. virgo.. love the outdoors and love to socialize, go out for drinks, restaurants, movies etc.. travel.. i have a lil kitty named BOO and i luv her to death... uhhh oh im a super horny gurl too but every gurl is they just wont admit it. so ilove watching p0rn and all that.. love sex etc blah blah blah...who doesnt..I really hope we get a chance to chat for a bit either online or on the fone before i get
there enxt week.. i hope u remmeber me and still wanna chill and arent married yet lol..
Hm. I told you I wanted to "chill"? That actually kind of doesn't sound like me. I prefer to use the term "hang out." Also, I don't know what day you're moving in, but I'm pretty sure I'll be too busy to help you. I probably mentioned this in our chats (I'm sorry but I really can't remember chatting with you specifically), but I don't like to help other people move. Since we've already chatted, I'm sure you know this, because I tell everyone, generally within a few minutes of meeting them. I think it's a good idea to get that out of the way early. "Hi, my name is Ricky and I really don't like to help other people move. I do like to watch reality television shows and run. Also, I am a skeptic, so please don't tell me your sign, or that you sometimes feel like you might have some 'psychic' abilities or that you once saw a ghost." But, then again, if I thought you were "cute" then I probably did offer to help you move. You have to be willing to compromise where cuties are concerned, that's my motto!

Perhaps, after you do get yourself moved in, I can come over and watch some p0rn with you.
OH YA also.. i need to find a job when i get there.. do u have any hookups or know anybody hiring? id LOVE to work in a bar or osmehting like that...really anythgin cause my current job is fun
and all.. and technically i CUD keep doign it but i want a change.. i currently work from home and well thats cool but i need ot be out
meeting people.. oh wait. i dont think i ever actually told u what i did? hmm shud i......????
In addition to helping you move in, you want help in finding a job? Well, I suppose I can't blame you for that, since I probably didn't specifically say "I'm not an employment service." Also, if I thought you were cute, I probably did tell you something like, "I'll help you in any way I can, just ask. Anything at all. Seriously. I mean anything.

But, really, if I knew of anybody hiring, I would get a job myself.
ok WELLLL... and dont get all weirded out
on me.. i work on a webcam chat community site and i get paid to chat with people and get naked HHAHA... BOMB right :)? I KNOW.. like i figure iim horny anyways why not get paid to chat with people and play with myself heheh...anyways i hope u dont look down on that and NO THATS NOT WHY IM CONTACTING U RELAX URSELF lol... i actually need help once i move and i remembered u live there so im reaching i said before this computer is a complete piece of CRAP and freezes NON STOP.. ive tried ot send this email to u maybe 3 times already and im hopign this time i can hit SEND before i run into trouble lol..
I hope that you don't use that laptop that's always freezing when you're on your webcam. It would be frustrating to be watching you and to have it stop streaming.

To answer your concern: No, I don't look down on that, not at all. In fact, do you think you could maybe introduce me to your boss? I could use some extra money-- do you need a good looking, young man with an upbeat if skeptical attitude and a surprising amount of body hair to chat with people and get naked? That really sounds like the bomb to me.

I might even help you move, if you could hook me up in that way.
ANYWAYS.. heres the deal....every month natalie (my boss) gives each of us 3 VIP codes to give out to whoever we want.. so with this code u can lgoin to watch me at work for free and dont have to pay like
everyone else... the only way i can give u one of the codes (so we can chat) is if you absolutey DO NOT give it out to anyone else and u ONLY USE IT FOR URSELF... i only get 3 a month and she gets pissed if more than 3 people use them so DONT SHARE IT MISTER
Okay, I won't share the VIP code, there's no NEED TO YELL AT ME about it.
.. i figured u cud always email me back instead but my email account doesnt even let me login half the time.. so the bets palce ot chat me is my chat room... if theres anyone else logged in when u sign in ill boot them out.. but
remember DONT SHARE THIS PASSWORD PLEASE BABE IM BEGGING U.. I TRUST U... im online most of the day now to try and save money for my move..
also since im in such a huge debt already form my student loan :(
Student loans, huh? I hear that. I'm so glad that you're taking some real initiative and working online to pay off your loans, instead of trying to get them forgiven, or whatever those Occupy Wall Street people are doing (I'm not really paying attention to that). But I'm worried that if I go to this chat room, we'll be chatting, and then your laptop will freeze up, and I won't get my VIP codes. Then where will I be? Stuck in a chat room all alone, with no VIP codes, that's where I'll be. It would probably be a better idea if I just gave you my phone number. While I'm at it, I'd better give you my street address. When you get into town, just stop by and let me know you're here. I assume you're driving in and you'll be tired. Maybe we can watch some p0rn together, or something.
I really thingk we need to chat before i get there and make sure u evern remember me hahha.. anyways ive rambled on and on now and ur probably soooo annnoyed with me so ill stop now.. im gonna go start work.. i
really hope u come chat me. it wud make my day and releive a lot of my stress about the move... REALLY i mean that....anyways once i see u in insdie ill shoot u myc ell number and u can gimme yours.. if u dont
wanna come chat i understand but its really the only palce to find me now days.. if u email me abck ill probably get it once i get there after my internet is setup so about 2-3 weeks fomr now.. but im hopign
to see u in my chat room.. rmemeber its 100% free with this code im gonna give u.. just DONT GIVE IT OUT OR ILL KICK U IN THE BALLS INSTEAD OF LICK U IN THE BALLS WHEN IS EE U hahahahha...k babe im out
for now... chat ya soon.. kisses xoxo
------>> http://XXXXXXXXXXXXXX
kisses madison xoxo
Madison, I'm starting to think that we really did chat on facebook. How could you have known that I prefer to have my balls licked rather than having them kicked? Yes, by all means, as I've already said, let's exchange cell phone numbers, to ensure that we don't miss each other again. I don't remember chatting with you, but I do miss our chats. You're a lot of fun-- one of the funnest friends I know, actually (none of my other friends has a webcam job like yours!). I'm a little confused as to why you would be able to communicate with me in a chat room but you won't have access to your email for 2-3 weeks, but then I'm not in the webcam business.


Anonymous said...

Since you didn't help her move in, she decided to move near me instead. One man's trash is another man's treasure, as they say. Ahhh, I can't wait to get my balls licked.

I am truley sorry for your lots.

Anonymous said...

She changed her name to PAIGE for me.

I want to post the whole thing on Facebook, just so I can say, "I shared it, bitch!"

Anonymous said...

No kidding, PAIGE sent me the same email.
She gets around.
But I don't mind sharing :P

hummingbird said...

I received an email from Paige as well. I guess she didn't realise that I'm female and could think of nothing worse than having to watch her with her, " little miss nasty" out... Lol! However, I must admit that although I don't have balls for her to lick, I certainly have a large house with many levels that she is more than welcome to vacuum. And 3 bathrooms that she can scrub. So although I may not be able to keep her tongue occupied, I can certainly keep her hands busy... Lmao!

Ricky Sprague said...

Yes, I've been getting the very same email, now signed by "Paige." This has increased my suspicions as to its authenticity. However, using your idea, hummingbird, I would like to invite both Paige and Madison over to my house for a little "MFF" action ("Mopping, Freshening, Fixing"). I could certainly use it.

Anonymous said...

If the webcam thing doesn't work out, I think she would have a sparkling career as a copy editor. Or maybe she could revise copy to make it more teen-friendly.

Anonymous said...

Did any of you go in the chat room?

Anonymous said...

my boyfriend and I thought that was some very clever writing Ricky , made us laugh . :)

Anonymous said...

I personally dont mind getting my balls kicked, I certainly prefer that to the licking.

Anonymous said...


You'd prefer to have your balls kicked as opposed to them being licked? Really?

I'm sorry but that makes you sound like one hell of a masochist

Anonymous said...

Your very disrepectful I stumbled upon this site and I am appalled at what you called Teresa.I hope she didn't see this or her children and husband, if you dont like her just change the channel you have a option. I personally adore her and would defend her. She has a genuine soul. Peace and Light